“Let it slide.”
Ever heard that line? Admittedly it has its downside, and that’s not an intentional pun. But without Slide, life would be just about intolerable. The trick is to use it judiciously. I freely admit, I’m still working on it, and I always will be...because it’s a dynamic term, applicable in very many ways and in so many situations. Misused, it’s just another way to procrastinate. But if it’s used well, it’s extremely advantageous.
Slide is tolerance. Let’s face it, everybody makes mistakes. No two people are always in sync with their thoughts and intentions, although some are better with that than others. Being out of sync with the feelings of another is no crime, but how often does it affect a relationship? If you asked me, I would say, continuously. My head doesn’t seem to work like anyone else’s. So if a significant other says something that sounds like it’s stupid, or maybe it’s vulgar, or even obnoxious or damaging, do you let it slide? Can you? Should you? Your decision will be based on how important the person is to you, for your own sake, keep that in mind. It will depend on the frequency of such occurrences. On the severity of the apparent infraction. Unfortunately, some of us have no tolerance at all for a misstep or a misspeak. But sometimes, people do screw up. Slide is not necessarily forgiveness, it’s somewhat tentative coolness. “Okay I’m just gonna let that slide.” A bit of advice...if you hear that as a response, take it seriously. Oh and by the way? Everyone is different, whether that difference is in appearance, demeanor or ethnicity. Slide should be on full-automatic for that, to your great advantage. In those cases, it may have less than nothing to do with any kind of personal relationship.
Slide makes it easier to re-group. Even some chickens know this. A flock of chickens is just about the most excitable assemblage on earth. I’ve kept chickens, you can come to feed and water them at the same times every day, and still, they’ll freak out when you enter their pen to do it. But they’ll re-group, settle down, and then mob the feeder. You’re forgiven, it’s time to eat. And there are always a few of the birds who hang out on the outskirts, placid and cool, because they aren’t as excitable as the rest. They’ll be the first ones to the feeder. Be cool. Is that project daunting? Set a time to begin, and take a break. When you reach the point where you told yourself you would start, hit it hard...but until then, you’re sliding. Be careful with this one. Your employer may not know how to let anything slide. But if he or she does not understand the importance of mental attitude, again, the job can become just about intolerable. Some bosses never learn this. It’s unfortunate. Trying to see things from their perspective may allow you to let that slide, too. Good luck.
Slide makes re-evaluation possible. It’s the exact opposite of a knee-jerk reaction. Sometimes, the situation seems to call for packing a bag and getting the hell out, or reacting with anger, or worse. Whoa! Slide is a step back, a step away, but it isn’t burning bridges. It isn’t getting you arrested. It isn’t getting you fired. It isn’t escalation of any kind. It doesn’t take a hike, it takes a walk. It allows one to cool off. It eliminates, not postpones, but eliminates conflict. Think about that! And how many songs have been written about regrets? How many families have been decimated by quick decisions? Think about the position from which you would prefer to re-evaluate. Unemployment? Alone, in a motel room? In a cell? Brother, sister! Slide. When you have to take action, at least know that it’s necessary.
By now it’s plain that this could go on forever. However when I sit down to write something, I never, ever just rip it off. I walk away, I walk circles, I think about it. I look things up. I re-word everything, as seems appropriate. I don’t publish it before it has aged a while. I re-read after my perspective has had a chance to change.
I’m not the best slider in the world. I’ve messed it up at least as much as I haven’t; but I’ve learned from it. At this point in time, I’m letting more slide than I should be. I consider it to be an adjustment. And it allows me to write.
My final bit of advice on the topic will be straightforward, and there's some urgency in it: Allow yourself to live. Take time, so that it doesn’t take you.
Slide.
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